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♥ Just way to bad to the max.

Sunday, April 5, 2009 -{'4/05/2009 12:42:00 AM

Omggg. Youth just now= horrible EVER! When I saw Sharon and asked her about how she got my blog link..the whole problem was stucked in my head AGAIN! *Cries* and now I'm crying again and stressed out. After asking her a question and she walked away, I cried at one corner. It was time for icebreaker but din't want to join. Was crying and cryinggg. And I told myself, I'm over with it. Just stop crying and just move your ass in to the fellowship room dumbo! And I obeyed what I told myself. Din't join them for the icebreaker. Sat at the sofa looking at them playing icebreaker and I was just like emo-ing and thinking about Pei Li. I was like, God! WHEN CAN IT BE STOPPED?! Val came over to me and asked me why am I crying and asked whether I'm ok I of course said yeah. That's my fav answer to the question "are you ok?" she pulled me out from the sofa and pulled my hand and I followed her. She wanna find out why I was crying and stuff. And yeah, told her. Thank God for Val. She's awesome.

Then we both went in for praise&worship. I saw Bel(my cell leader) waiting for me at the door. So, I used to other day to escape. :p and when Val was talking to me..Chen Eng came over asking Val whether I'm ok and stuff. So, I can't worship God at ALL just now. The problem between me and Pei Li was stuck and stuck and stuck. Gosh, isn't there any equipment in my brain that can suck out the problem from my head? Its way to annoying to the max I tell you. So, during announcements time. Still thinking and thinking. Then it was sermon time. Josh preached. Mel asked us to break into our cell and I was like holy shit! Crap. Here it goes. I was trying to be far away from my cell but Bel kept on pulling me to where the cell is. -.- Then she said to me, "later I talk to you." I was like "Nooooooooooo!" etc. Can't concentrate during sermon too. Now the worst thing is Pei Li, Sharon and Adren was stucked in my head. Give me a break man! I went out of the room, went to the beach area..looked at the sky and thank God for the stars and the moon he created. I can see half of the city from the beach and dude, what a nice view. Spent about 6 mins over there? Then, decided to walked the whole of Sutera to just chill and relax. It was a good exercise though. Should do that another time again. So after all the walking felt better(..NOT!). The moment I stepped in to the fellowship room. DAMN, STUCKED AGAIN.

I went nursery room to talk to God and asked him for help. Went in went out. When Josh was preaching, he showed them a video. Almost the end of the video, I went in the room. Sat at one corner. Bel saw me, pulled me but I din't want to get up. Then Josh said that she has to say out a verse. Something like that lah! Then I teased her, "Ala!:p" I was stupid cause when she said the verse, I could have ran away rite? But nooooooo, I was still sitting there and when Bel finished, she came over to me and pulled me. -.- and I gave up, so followed her. We talked. blah blah blah. She kept pujuk-ing me to tell her whats going on with me. And Sherlene came(DANG, Wished she was talking to Bel like the whole time!) over and disturbing me and Bel. After the talked, gawsh, still stucked in my head. After youth, felt like crying again. I was sitting along staring at people talking to me and Chen Eng came and prayed for me. Felt blessed. (: then, saw Joanne crying so I joined in. :p Ps.John saw me and started talking to me. And man, that was scary. Haha. Well, I will write to him lah about what I'm facing cause I have to. And I want to. I want it to be out from my head and throw it into the bin. :p after talking, em gave me a hug..vanessa and brenda talked to me too and yeah. Kinda felt better.

So now, I'm back home. Just read Pei Li's reply and dude, it hurts more. ): LIFE SUCKS.

P.S.: GIVE ME A BREAK GOD WILL YOU? CAN YOU EVEN HEAR MY CRY?!

Maxine.

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